June 30th, 2010

A Birthday

first lines

Ah, the discouragement it gives, when you are trying to polish your first line to the glossy hook that will catch your reader and drag him kicking and screaming to the next line, when you realize that other writers are capable of effortlessly spining off such peerless gems as these:
The dark, drafty old house was lopsided and decrepit, leaning in on itself, the way an aging possum carrying a very heavy, overcooked drumstick in his mouth might list to one side if he were also favoring a torn Achilles tendon, assuming possums have them.
or
He walked into the bar and bristled when all eyes fell upon him -- perhaps because his build was so short and so wide, or maybe it was the odor that lingered about him from so many days and nights spent in the wilds, but it may just have been because no one had ever seen a porcupine in a bar before.
Yes, the Bulwer-Lytton contest announced its results.